“If I can just love others, they will love me, Then I will be lovable, and I can love me."

The reverse of this is that so many people hate themselves because they feel there is not another whom love them. This is a sickness – it’s when people are truly “lovesick” because the truth is, other people do love them, but it doesn’t matter. No matter how many people profess their love for them, it is not enough.

First, they don’t believe you. They think you are trying to manipulate them – trying to get something. (How could you love them for what they truly are? No. the re must be mistake. You must want something! Now what do you want?)

They sit around trying to figure out how anyone could love actually love them. So they don’t believe you, and embark on a campaign to make you prove it. You have to prove your love for them. To do this, they may ask you to start altering your behavior.

Second, if they finally come to a place where they can believe you love them, they begin to worry about how long they can keep your love. So, in order to hold onto your love, they start altering their behavior..

Thus, two people literally lose themselves in a relationship. They get into the relationship hoping to find themselves, and they lose themselves instead.

The losing of Self in a relationship is what causes most of the bitterness in couplings.

Two people join together in a partnership hoping that the whole will be greater than the sum of the parts, only to find that it’s less. They feel less than when they are single. Less capable, less able, less exciting, less attractive, less joyful, less content.

Relationships were never meant to be this way. Yet this is how they are experienced by more people that you could ever know.

Why? Why?

Because people have lost touch with (if they ever were in tough with) the purpose of the relationships.

When you lose sight of each other as sacred souls on a sacred journey, then you cannot see the purpose, the reason, behind all relationships.

The soul has come to the body, and the body to life, for the purpose of evolution. You are evolving and you are becoming. And you are using your relationship with everything to decide what you are becoming.

This is the what you came here to do. This is the Joy of creating Self. Of knowing Self. Of becoming, consciously, what you wish to be. It is what is meant by being Self conscious.

You are here in the in the relative world so that you might have the tools with which to know and experience Who You Really Are. Who You Are is who you create yourself to be in relationship to all the rest of it.

Your personal relationships are the most important elements in the process. Your personal relationships are therefore Holy ground. They have virtually nothing to do with the other, yet, because they involve another, they have everything to do with the other.

This is a divine dichotomy. This is the closed circle. So it is not such a radical teaching to say, “Blessed are the Self-centered, for they shall know God.” It might not be a bad goal in your life to know the highest part of your Self, and to stay centered in that.

Your first relationship, therefore, must be with your Self.

You must first see your Self as worthy before you can see another as worthy. You must first see your Self as blessed before you can see another as blessed. You must first know Your self to be holy before you can acknowledge holiness in another.

If you put the cart before the horse – as most religions ask you to do – and acknowledge another as holy before you acknowledge yourself, you will one day resent it. If there is one thing none of you can tolerate, is someone being holier than thou. Yet your religions force you to call others holier than thou. And so you do it – for a while. Then you crucify them.

You have crucified (in one way or another) all of My teachers, not just One. And you did so not because they were holier than thou, but because you made them out to be.

My teachers have all come with the same message. Not “I am holier than thou, “ but “You are as holy as am I.”

This is the message you have not been able to hear; this is the truth you have not been able to accept. And this is why you have never truly, purely fallen in love with your Self.

And so I tell you this: Be now and forever centered upon your Self. Look to see what you are being, doing, and having in any given moment, not what’s going on with another.

It is not the action of another, but in your re-action that your salvation will be found.

I believe some of us may respond with: I know better, but somehow it sounds as though we should not mind what others do to us in relationships. They can do anything, and so long as we hold our equilibrium, keep our Self centered, and all that good stuff, nothing can touch us. But others do tough us. Their actions do sometimes hurt us. It is when the hurt comes into relationships that I don’t know what to do. It’s all very well to say “stand aside from it; cause it means nothing,” but that’s easier said than done. I do get hurt by the words and actions of others in relationships.”

God responds: The day will come when you will not. That will be the day on which you realize – and actualize – the true meaning of relationships; the reason for them.

It is because you have forgotten this that you react the way you do. But that is alright. That is part of the growth process. It is part of evolution. It is Soul Work you are up to in relationship, yet there is a grand understanding, a grand remembering. Until you remember this – and remember then also how to use relationship as a tool in the creation of Self – you must work at the level at which you are. The level of understanding, the level of willingness, the level of remembrance.

And so there are things you can do when you react with pain and hurt to what another is being, saying or doing. The first is to admit honestly to yourself and to another exactly how you are feeling. This many of you are afraid to do, because you think it will make you “look bad.” Somewhere, deep inside of you, you realize that it probably is ridiculous for you to “feel that way.” It probably is small of you. You are “bigger than that.” But you can’t help it. You still feel that way.

There is only one thing you can do. You must honor your feelings. For honoring your feelings means honoring your Self. And you must love your neighbor as you love yourself. How can you expect to understand and honor the feelings of another if you cannot honor the feelings within your Self?

The first question in any interactive process with another is: now Who Am I, and Who Do I want to Be in relationship to that?

Often you do not remember Who You Are, and do not know who You Want to Be until you try out a few ways of being. That is why honoring your truest feelings are so important.

If you are feeling a negative feeling, simply having that feeling is frequently all that is needed to step away from it. It when you have the anger, have the upset, have the disgust, have the rage, own the feeling of wanting to “hurt back” that you can disown these first feelings as “not Who You Want to Be.”

The Master is one who has lived though enough such experiences to know in advance what his/her final choices are. The Master does not need to “try out” anything. The Master has worn these clothes before and know they do not fit. And since the Master’s life is devoted to the constant realization of Self as one knows oneself to be, such ill fitting feelings would never be entertained.

This is why the Master is imperturbable in the face of what others might call calamity. A master blesses calamity, for the Master knows that from the seeds of disaster (and all experience) comes the growth of Self. And the Master’s second life purpose is always growth. For once one has fully Self Realized, there is nothing left to do except to do more of that.

#heaven #WixBlog